Tag Archives: Shopping

Moving

22 Aug

I know not what we’ll use in the first trips” I told my dad, who last moved some thirty three years ago, paraphrasing on Albert Einstein’s famous quote about the weapons of WW4, “but on the last trip we’ll use trash bags“. And boy was I right.

Everybody hates moving. Movers hate moving because it’s hard labor that pays little and you get attitude from your boss and the customers. The customer hates it because some sweaty mover guy is touching their shit and might accidentally find their porn/sex toy/pot/you name it. DIY wannabees like me hates it because it’s a lot of work, you get hurt, you get angry at all the people you helped move who won’t come to help you, and your dad might accidentally find your porn/sex toy/pot/ you name it.

In my case it was watching my dad, who traveled such a long distance just to help us, holding a bra in one hand and my dirty underwear in another. Will I do the same for my kids?

Towards the end, when we ran out of boxes and started filling trash bags with totally unrelated items (clothes and frozen food, a plunger and soccer shoes, etc.) it was time to pick my son up from day care, and when we put him in the car seat, a sign of the times, he said: “I donwanna go to Home Depot“. But we did.

Coupon

3 Jun

Never get between a parent and his/her diapers coupons.Shopping Cart

There was no line at the automated cashier  at the supermarket. Yes, we needed the milk, butter, and other items in the somewhat full cart, but we stopped at the store because of a  $3 diaper coupon that was about to expire. We didn’t have much time, It was nap time for the kids and I had an important phone call to make.

“This is not a coupon sir, it’s an advertisement” said the lanky guy who helps when you hit the “Get help/ Cancel an item” button. “There is no barcode”. “I don’t care, it is saying, $3 off”. “That’s on your next purchase”. But this is my next purchase, that’s how I got the coupon”. “Sorry sir, there is no barcode”. “Listen buddy, you either give me the $3, or get your manager right now”. “No problem sir”. A very young looking, Hobbit sized girl shows up. “Sir, this is clearly not a coupon, there is no barcode, you will get the coupon with your next purchase, that is,hmm, this one”. Now I was really getting pissed off, this shouldn’t be so complicated. The third “supervisor” was wearing the same uniform as the first two, and was trying to explain to the idiot customer the same thing using almost the same words. By then, I missed the important call, the kids (who were very patient) were past their nap time, but all of that did not matter. I would easily buy coffee for everyone at work without a second thought, but you must have a death wish if you fuck with my diaper coupons. If to paraphrase on This, I’m getting my $3!

Then the Hobbit came back with the news that his highness, the store manager decided to grant us our wish and “just this time” give us a $3 discount. We won the battle.

But not the war. Because as I was paying, the coupon printer started working and a $3 voucher, with a barcode came out. and the lanky guy saw, and I saw that he saw, and he saw that I saw that he saw. And he was hiding a smile.